The Camper Chronicles: Confessions and Stories From Our Summer in Jackson Hole

We are 3 days away from packing up our few belongings here in J.H. and venturing back to good ole' Rexburg.
It's a bittersweet time for us.
Rexburg means school; yuck. But it also means more than 210 sq.ft. of living space, less physical jobs, and more bills (yikes)! Woohoo!
Jackson has been our home for a short time and it has given us memories and moments that we will cherish for a lifetime. How lucky are we?
I've tried to compile every noteworthy encounter with our lovely guests, the messes they leave, and the adventures we've had with our awesome coworkers!

1. I was working in the store one morning when this Chinese lady waltzed in and went straight for the coffee machine. She was rocking one of those hats with an extra long visor and big sunglasses that shielded her face from any and all sunlight. She looked at TV screen atop the coffee machine and said with extra gusto, "One large coffee pwease!" I glanced over to see if she was speaking to me, but nope! She was patiently waiting for the TV to tell the coffee machine to brew her some coffee. To her surprise, she had to pull down a lever and pour it herself! True story. Lol.

2. Corey was working the store when another oriental woman ran in yelling "Gas! Gas!!" She hustled to the paper towel dispenser and started waving her hand above and below the sensor, which resulted in making a simple task a very difficult one. Bless her.
Eventually Corey understood that a group of Chinese folk finished pumping gas but while they were removing the nozzle, they were still squeezing it and released gas EVERYWHERE! They screamed and flung the nozzle in the air. Mercy. I guess orientals don't put gas into their own cars in Asia?💁

3.There I was. Minding my own business. Cleaning rooms like any other average 4th of July.
There was one more precious room to clean. 109.
One of the two pet rooms on the property, so obviously Kiana and I ere in for a surprise.
I put my key in the door and turner with eagerness, knowing this was the last one.
My half-hearted smile turned into a look of disgust when a massive waft of air hit my face.

POOP.

I knew it. There was no doubt in my mind that something nasty was awaiting my discovery. After what seemed like a thorough investigation, I saw a wadded up towel conveniently shoved in an inconspicuous corner.
I kicked it out with my foot, only to reveal brown mess smooshed all over the pure white fibers. After a few "heck nah's" and a little bit of dry heaving, Heather (A.K.A. The Poop Slayer - Pictured below with hubby and maintenance guru George) came to the rescue to dispose of the ungodly surprise.
The lady was charged a fair amount for the mess, but she certainly wasn't sorry for it. Some peoples kids!

We love these guys!!!

4. The note shown below was handed in with a guests set of keys. He wasn't too pleased with the shower head. Yikes! 😫

5. Below is an example of a typical morning for housekeepers who are cleaning up after Asian families who flee to the parks in their rental Suburbans. They are consistent, I must say. And for that reason solely, they are not our favorite guests. 😶😵

6. Just moments after the above picture was taken, George told me that the Asian family next door flushed a bar of soap down the toilet... 20 minutes later, that toilet had to be removed from the room completely. Yaayyyy! 😁

7. This here is a foreign travelers DREAM! A handy-dandy cloth toilet seat cover. One that is sure to protect you from any unwanted and unseen diseases. Too bad they left it behind. I wonder if they're doing okay?

8. Pictured here is the one-and-only Flat Creek golf cart that can transport insurmountable drippy trash bags from one end of the property to the big rubbish bins on the other side.

It also doubles as a taxi for any and all employees in need of a joy ride (I think 7 people is the max?? Don't tell Kyle;)

9. I was having a rough day....until I found a dolla in the washa. HOLLA!

This is how I felt post-dolla-finding. Like a G. A rich G.

10. We all got real good at making towel animals. They evolved from swans to elephants, to giraffes, to whales. They were most definitely the reason for an increase in tips from our guests. Carissa even made over $100 IN ONE DAY!!

Tip yo housekeepers mate! It's a tough life cleaning up after you and yo kids!

11. I met Josh Holloway from Lost. SO COOL! We just recently started watching it again together, and it didn't take long to realize what a jerk he plays on that stinkin' island...but he was a nice dude in real life!

12. We went white water rafting with Jackson Hole Whitewater in July. It was such a treat, and we didn't die, so that's a plus!

13. These pictures remind me of the time that Tanner took us to float Flat Creek. We were all on simple tubes that we thought would be appropriate for a short jaunt down the creek. Boy were we wrong!

The water was high and so were our spirits...until our heads almost got chopped off by the low hanging bridges with nails protruding from underneath.

The water was so fast that we had to paddle frantically with our arms to avoid running into every pointy bush and tree along the creek.

Well, Corey and I were in a two person tube, which didn't allow for much control or finesse. As a result, we ping ponged our way through the entire float until we were covered in bruises, scratches, and branches for hair accessories.

Corey kept letting me know that he was "NOT HAVING FUN ANYMORE!"

I couldn't help but laugh and cry a little every time we came around a corner only to see another 2-3-4 foot waterfall with a big, sharp tree trunk in the middle that we had to maneuver around.

Our arms were dead by the time we found a place shallow enough to stand and abandon to the float trip altogether.

Little did we know, Aislynn and Jenneca's tube popped into oblivion, our Serbian co-worker Alex's tube floated down stream and he had to hitchhike home with a kind stranger, and Tanner's Iphone, Apple watch, and car keys caught the tide to who knows where.

We survived with a story to tell and a lot of scrapes to show for it.

No pictures were salvaged, but here is a Google pic of how low the bridges were!